Oh those wacky Christians

Here are some bits from the bible that I find amusing.

Jesus may love you; but God hates you if you're a long haired hippy freak...
1 Corinthians 11
"14 Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him?
15 But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering.
16 But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God "

In John 2:1 to 2:11 Jesus turns water into wine, this was Jesus' first miracle and therefore can be considered the springboard of Christianity. However conservative the pope is, and however uptight religious groups get; just remember that the whole thing started because the son of God wanted to keep the party going. Also note that he hung out primarily with a hooker when your parents tell you to keep away from the riff-raff.

From the Anglican side; Anglican Article of Faith XXXVII states that "...The Bishop of Rome hath no jurisdiction in thes Realm of England..." I love that bit; it means I get to ignore Roman Catholicism.

More to come later.

Cheers,

The real words to that song

--Brahm's Lullabye--

Lullaby and goodnight
With roses be dight
Creep into thy bed
There pillow thy head
If god will thou shalt wake
when the morning doth break
If god will thou shalt wake
when the morning doth break

Lullaby and goodnight
those blue eyes close tight
bright angels around you
so sleep without fear
they will guard you from harm
with their dreamland's sweet charm
they will guard you from harm
with their dreamland's sweet charm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


For those curious "dight" means to wear or to be adorned with.

Cheers,

Cooking for primates

I returned to the classic recipe for food this weekend while camping and found it very satisfying.

-Make Fire
-Put chunk of meat on knife
-Put meat into fire
-Take meat out of fire
-Eat meat while staring at fire

Cheers,

Spaghetti

How to cook spaghetti dinner like a lazy person:

-Decide to go out for dinner
-Check e-mail before going out for dinner
-Have friends message you and talk on MSN getting progressively hungrier as the hours pass
-Once last friend is done talking, realise it's too late to go out for dinner and wander downstairs in search for sustinance.
-Fight with drawer to release pot and pan
-Put a pot of water on the stove and set it on "max"
-Throw in whatever spices smell good (I remember bay leaves and orgegano)
-Once water is boiling, throw in a handful of spaghetti
-Realise that what you really want is angel hair pasta but the stores are all closed
-Make mental note to buy angel hair pasta
-Stir the spaghetti a little bit
-Throw olive oil on the pan and put it on another burner set somewhat hot.
-Add some ground meat to the pan and break it up into little bits.
-Stir the various bits while you clean up the kitchen
-If you're lucky they'll be ready at the same time and you can throw both hot meals directly onto your plate.
-Cover the food in parmaesan; you haven't added enough if there is still more cheese in the container.
-Eat and enjoy while adding to blog
-Finish blog then go downstairs to do dishes..


Cheers,
Owen.

The good, the bad and the ugly

I intend to update this list from time to time; we'll see how well that turns out.



The Good
- A smooth landing in rough weather
- Big meals with good people
- Sandeman Ruby Port
- Napping in the sun
- Silver
- Sunsets
- Warm dry socks on cold wet feet



The Bad
- Conciousness
- Cheap coffee
- Hot, muggy days
- Fatty meat
- Fast food
- Fake holiday happiness
- Failure to display dignity
- Olera (Sola Nero) port
- Worn out shoes
- My last haircut
- Sake (Japanese Rice Wine)
- Commies


The Ugly
- My car
- Whichever mirror I happen to be nearby
- Clip on ties
- A dark heart

Mumble mumble....

Went gliding this weekend; my first flight as a Civillian Instructor; oddly enough there were absolutely no cadets on the flightline that day. This worked out well for me; it resulted in me getting the eight additional flights required to get me qualified for rearseat flying, plus I got to go to a fun gathering afterwards with some of the officers. I wore my civvies and leather jacket (1970's brown leather given to me by my uncle); and my jacket was subsequently declared my "pimp jacket".... which lead me to the question: is a fuzzy hat with a peacock feather considered appropriate flight headgear?

For reasons unclear to me; in the last week or so I've been approached at least a half dozen times by grade nine girls who want to say hi; I chalk this up to one of two things: springtime or aliens; personally I'm leaning towards "aliens" it makes more sense to me.

Now for a piece of random explanation of my E-mail address CRATCDT_Mountie@hotmail.com. I got this e-mail address back when I was still a cadet and taking my instructor's course about three or four years ago. CRATCDT is the Central Region Advanced Training Cadet Drill Team; the elite drill team which I was oh so proud to have been part of at the time (it was actually very demanding for me; I was busy with multiple things that summer). The "Mountie" part referes to the character of Constable Benton Fraiser on the show Due South; the perpetually polite and well groomed RCMP officer. Apparently I was similar to this guy because a couple of people kept calling me Mountie over the summer; the name only briefly stuck and didn't even last out the entire summer but I was stuck for E-mail address ideas.


Yes, I know that most of these posts are incoherent, don't make sense, ramble on and are generally uninteresting but that's of little concern to me; I censor my writting before posting, but rarely edit.




Cheers,

Failed Sociology Assignment

In sociology a little while ago we had to submit an assignment where we talked about our ideal mate and make reference to our past relationships. The teacher actually failed me on the assignment for not taking it seriously; apparently when I listed off all the weird situations I've been in she thought I was making it up. I actually had to re-submit the assignment and explain that I was being serious; when she returned the second assignment it encluded words of encouragement for future relationships. I think I'm supposed to be depressed that my sociology teacher is taking pity on me, but I got a decent mark in the end so I don't really mind.


Cheers,